If this week’s chilly, spritzy days made you nervous about the coming season, thank your lucky stars that you’re not embroiled in an equinox-set murder mystery this morning.
Bill de Blasio is not so lucky. This week the clutzy giant has been implicated in an unspeakable disaster, and, now, thanks to the New York Post, the New York Times and even the UK’s Mail Online, the children of Staten Island know what zoo officials had apparently tried to keep quiet.
Charles G. Hogg, dear sleepy Chuck, the shadow-fearing prescient creature who has, for years, helped to cushion bad weather news for countless winter-weary souls, found no soft landing for himself.
In fact, he was not himself at all, the poor thing, when he tumbled his last. If investigative reports are correct, the creature who fell (or was dropped?) from the welder-gloved hands of the City’s Mayor, was actually Charlotte, a substitute, found dead at the zoo on Feb. 9, a week after this year’s fateful holiday.
Bill Murray’s tale aside, Groundhog Day will never be the same.
May today’s autumnal-equinox cookies, baked in memoriam, help you bear the cold days ahead in his/her absence.
Come and get ’em!
P.S. To my knowledge, no groundhogs (or teddy bears) were harmed in my kitchen this morning.